Emotional Christmas Mass, Selfies, and Recollections

December 28, 2023

I spent Christmas away from home for the seventh time this year. I'm feeling both sad and thankful at the same time. I am thankful for God's unwavering opportunities and for the blessings I have received this year. Still, it saddens me to have spent seven Christmases away from home, especially considering that this is the first time that our father wasn't with us. But for my family and me, life must go on. I should be happy with my life even though I'm alone. That's probably what my dad would want me to do as well.

I attended a Christmas mass at St. John Cathedral on the afternoon of the 25th, and I was emotional while singing the Christmas song which was the last part of the mass. Sad emotions and thoughts ran through my mind and I was moved to tears. I wasn't alone, some Filipinos in the mass were emotional as well. This is only one of the challenging circumstances that we Filipino workers abroad must face. Many of us are still working during times when we should be spending time with our loved ones, while others are celebrating on their own. We eventually still become emotional even though we've grown used to that circumstance. Anyone would, especially on Christmas.

Although my friend and I were meant to attend the same mass, we ended up attending different masses at churches that were only a short distance apart because we woke up late and arrived at Central late. I ended up in St. John Cathedral, and she ended up attending the mass at St. Joseph Cathedral. I stayed at the park at the back of the church while waiting for my friend to arrive. I was drawn to the strikingly colored poinsettia flowers and snapped a few pictures before settling down to wait for her.

A gift was waiting for my friend, and it was my first giving her one in my entire stay here in Hong Kong. I received gifts from her these past two years, but I just gave her once this year. Although it was a gift, but I didn't want to owe anyone anything, so I decided it was time to give her a present.

I saw some Filipinos singing Christmas carols at the park while I waited. They would accept any amount of money, which would then go to their churches. I handed a man some money after he paused and performed a carol. A group of Filipinas performed carols for a few foreign tourists. They probably got a respectable sum of Hong Kong dollars.

Listening to Christmas carols brought back a lot of good Christmas memories. I missed the times when I used to go caroling around our neighborhood with my relatives when I was younger. I missed the days when we got up too early to go to the Simbang Gabi or Misa de Galo. They said that if we completed the masses before Christmas Eve, our wishes would be fulfilled. I missed the days when we would go around the town to gather candy from neighbors and gifts from grandparents following the early Christmas mass. Above all, I missed spending those simple Christmas holidays with my family, and having simple feasts on the table.

These are things that will only live on in my childhood recollections, no matter how much I wish I could do them again. Being an adult and the only provider has made life far too different, but Filipino Christmas memories will always be a part of me, no matter where life takes me.

(All photos are mine)

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