Chaos
I wake and see the bathroom light on, and the small red light of the Royal-brand fan at the foot of my bed, showing it is charging. I have been crying in the dream, and the lights blur. It was a sad dream, very sad. I was with my grandmother Tita, and I believe she came to give me an important message: not to lose sight of real bonds.
Sitting on the edge of the bed, I gently wipe my eyes with my hands and reflect on it, while my feet search for the slippers — I don’t know if they are by the side or near the fan. I am glad that at last the electricity has been restored. Perhaps it will last all night, enough for the little in the fridge to freeze.
So, I go there and take out a small packet of salted crackers and a jar where I kept homemade grated coconut and passion fruit treat. I grab a spoon and taste it before…
‘Oh, it is so delicious, sweet and sharp because I didn’t add too much sugar…truly, I think, I did a wonderful job.’
I breathe deeply, enjoying this nice moment. I am already savouring the blend with the first cracker… at twelve-something in the night… and another thought comes.
‘Thank you, I am still here.’
And another.
‘Everything passes.’
There is chaos everywhere, but it must not be within me. I made this sweet on the charcoal stove. When there is no electricity, there are other things I can do to feel useful: cooking, gardening, arranging my things, hand‑washing small items of clothing, reading, playing with my dog, going for a bike ride… serving someone, smiling, helping to bring a touch of colour to any greyness.
Nothing belongs to me except my thoughts. I will leave here with nothing; when that day comes, it will not wait for me to finish the packet of salted crackers or the grated coconut and passion fruit treat. Nor to wear the T-shirt my sister sent me, with a scent so lovely it filled every corner of my room. It was a sweet, floral scent… I am more drawn to citrus scents, but this one had the extra gift of being packed by my sister, like the container of magnesium tablets, with my name written on it in her hand. I don’t know when I will see my sister again…
I am trying not to lose my calm and mental health amid all this chaos that is not only enclosing this small island, but the whole world. I hope that one day I won’t even have to try, that it will happen naturally. This, I have thought, is yet another test.
We do not know how all this will end; all we can do is trust that it will pass. To seek calm and silence, to listen to the voice of our soul that guides us, that whispers what we truly need in each moment.
Original content by @nanixxx. All rights reserved ©, 2026.
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Good morning, @nanixxx. What can I say... thank you for being there, for bringing light into the shadows. Whether you have data or not, I wish you a wonderful Wednesday... spring is just starting to peek through here.
Un abrazo muy grande!!
Buenos días. 🌞🌸 Gracias por tus buenos deseos, yo también deseo que tengas un día precioso. Disfrútalo por ti y por mí. Fuera preocupaciones... bienvenidas las ocupaciones, aunque solo sea respirar y sentir la brisa.
Son grandes responsabilidades; no las descuides. 🤗
The first step is to form thoughts, to imagine and feel that things already exist, but the ‘how’ and the paths that will be forged to make that happen, that’s something else entirely. That moment when you found what you were eating absolutely delicious… that moment and what you felt is important, along with the smells you experienced. I hope you’ll be able to see your sister soon. Life takes many twists and turns, and sometimes they aren’t that long.
How meaningful the photographs you’ve chosen are, as if you were waiting for a call from the other side, one from someone from the past, one that is about to happen. It’s true, there are many things we can do whilst the paths are being created; just look at the end result. Don’t lose sight of it.🤗
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If you only knew… I do not plan anything. I feel that things are there in a moment, and I take them, keep them, and then—without much thought—they become part of the process, part of that wider image. Here I have shared a brief moment of my life… I live so many in a single day… so many thoughts, so many sensations ((as everyone does, of course)). There is something within me that whispers: write this, it matters. That is how it works. Other moments remain in my memory like sediment, until another moment stirs them and they rise to the surface—whether transformed into a reflection, into a burden lightened by the passing days, or into a fragment of myself that longs to be here…
Gracias, Avecilla. Desde lo más profundo de mi corazón, gracias. 😌
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Es una forma de vivir el presente y de sentir cada vivencia como única, eso es muy importante!! Gracias a vos!🤗
Living where I do, it's so familiar to understand how hardship makes us scrutinize ourselves and become, let's say, "more resilient" than average, even though we often feel overwhelmed by so many things happening at once... Excellent lines, very similar to our recent past and to "a present that here still doesn't seem to want to leave or change completely"... Thank you for writing @nanixxx friend...
!discovery
!PIZZA
Perhaps the secret is to keep everything as simple as possible… and to have patience with what lies out there, but above all with ourselves.
Thank you, truly, thank you.
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It's the best attitude one can adopt in this crazy world... Your writing reminded me of George Harrison's beautiful album: All Things Must Pass. ¡Abrazo!