Emotions and Me | Refugee Life
One of my colleagues said that you are too involved in your work, which is unsuitable for your mental health. The people who know me and are very close to me (the colleagues who work with me), started noticing changes related to me. I have been dealing with stress and anxiety lately and don't know how I will solve this issue. I am very stubborn but also a silent person and this kind of character and attitude are unacceptable for my work. People who work here are very outspoken and they easily can share their perspectives and opinion. The people who came from the war like me, suffer.
In my previous post, I wrote many things related to my work. Recently I have been trying to find an organization that can help me understand my labor rights. I started feeling that I have been facing unfair and biased situations at work and to understand this situation, I need a volunteer. I think employers at my work are taking advantage of my silence thinking I don't know any rights and rules of Dutch labor.
I know many of you don't like to read this kind of negative post where I only explain my problematic life. I completely understand that and because of this realization, I have reduced posting as well. I know people don't like to know about others' problems because everybody has to deal with their own problems. But yes, my Hive profile always reminds me of my growth, my life, and how far I have come. Life is not always about happiness and positivity. I believe uncertain things, darkness, and sadness are part of life as well.
This photo has taken before sunrise. I think the time was around 5.30 am, I was outside smoking and noticed this beautiful pinkish-bluish sky. I thought it would a nice idea to capture this moment because this kind of sky before sunrise, nobody notices much. Gigi normally doesn't like to go out early morning, she likes daylight but, as I start my shift at 6.00 am, I always take her out for an early morning walk.
Gigi is a very intelligent dog and she observes me and my activities precisely. When she sees me anxious and stressed, she stays silent and lies down near me. I try not to show my emotions to her but I can't hide anything in front of her tremendous "sense" ability. I don't want to see Gigi dealing with anxiety and sadness but gradually I noticed that I transfer my anxiety to her unknowingly. I should stop this situation before it's too late.
Gigi needs neutralization surgery so I am looking for a vet who can help me. I don't have much idea about the spay or neuter process of a dog, I was looking for the treatment cost and I must admit that is not cheap. But as I have been saving some money, I think I will be able to carry Gigi's Neutralization surgery costs.
My dad left for Saudi Arabia to fulfill one of his wishes. He is staying there for a month, exploring Makkah, Medina. My sister is alone in Bangladesh and I am here in the Netherlands. My personal life, family life, and professional life everything is so messed up that I don't know where I should start solving them one by one. I started feeling like this was my fate and that probably I did something wrong in life that's why I am suffering.
Despite all the negativity, something positive happened in life. I went to Utrecht City and had a great time there. The weather was nice, the trip went smoothly and I was able to gather a whole new experience in life. I have taken a lot of photos and video clips as well. I will spend this weekend editing those photos and videos.
Thank you so much for reading...
Love
Priyan...
I am @priyanarc.... An architect, a dreamer, and a passionate writer who loves to write about life. I try to present my own perspective and experiences. Please leave your feedback and criticism because it's the only way I can know and reach your mind and thought easily...
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All images used are captured by the author...
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I loved the photo, I also like the sunrises for the colors that form on the horizon, and that also contrasts with the lights of the buildings. In particular these images transmit me some feeling.
Thank you so much. Yes, the moment was unique and I have never experienced such moments in life. Such a kind of sky is very rare to see...
Beautiful pics! ♥️
I hope everything will be okay at your work soon or you will find a better one.
Do you plan any family reunion? It might be something to make you feel better.
Hugs from Poland 😘
Thank you so much...
I wanted but we are not allowed to leave EU and if I leave, I can't come back. My family can visit me but they are taking some time to visit me...
Love you...
It’s okay to feel this way, we all have our down phases in life. I love to read your blogs coz you really show real side of your life no fake stuff. I hope everything gets better for you and your family soon.
Thank you so much dear, it means a lot to me...
Please don't think you should keep quiet about your feelings. They're better out, than in. I don't think anyone expects you to be really happy under the circumstances. If you want to vent, then you vent!
Love your photos. X
And I should do this at my job also, I consume everything silently and let people taking my advantage... I need to learn how to talk to people directly under circumtances...
I used to be the same in my younger days. My confidence has grown with age. I used to get to the end of my tether before I said anything, but it always came out in an angry way, then I'd look the bad guy. I learnt to say things sooner in a much calmer, less emotional way. It took me a long time to realise this though.
I hope you get help to improve your employment situation. It is unpleasant that, already in a difficult situation, people try to take advantage of a state of weakness.
Certainly most people I know don't like posts that aren't overflowing with positivity, I was also struck by them because my most recent day-to-day posts were very charged with tense emotions, so I gave it some thought and I decided to try to channel those feelings... for now I will not say that I am successful in that, but I understand you. Sometimes life is not easy and situations are not entirely pleasant.
The photos show a sky that I find beautiful :)
You can't blame yourself for bad things, like war, in this world, on many occasions, bad things can happen to good people. Do not look for blame for your situation if the causes are things that are totally beyond your control.
May Gigi be well, she is accompanying you and really pet dogs are very sensitive to their humans. I think it is extremely difficult to hide feelings from our dogs. By the way, let it be resolved well and soon about Gigi's sterilization operation.
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hi @priyanarc
i recently sang the song 'fight song'
i'm sharing it with you to cheer you up.
and hope GIGI gets better.
stay safe and if you ever need someone to chat with or keep in touch with, i'm here and im sure many more #hive #friends are here too for you.
love lots,
@erelasblog
p.s.
here's the link https://hive.blog/hive-105786/@erelasblog/awjonupt
Thank you so much dear, love the song...
Beautiful photos and you are right, mornings before sunrise are the best! And regarding your work, stress, and anxiety, I suppose that many people suffer from that... I have a friend who has 2 "regular" jobs, working almost all day, probably trying to hide personal issues by working 24 hours per day... It's like drug addicts, or alcoholics are doing... But, the opposite thing happens... the stress and anxiety are multiplying as of too much work, and the cycle goes around and around...
Nice to hear that you had a great time in Utrecht... Maybe you should repeat it by visiting some other city?
Have an awesome weekend! All the best!
Exactly and I know I am not alone. I started feeling that I am too involved in this work which is not good. I don't see any career growth staying in this job so now I am just waiting for the right time to quit.
I will visit some other cities as well...
Happy Sunday :)
Personally, I think this is a good place to vent, around people that love you and respect you. We want to know what is going on with you, not just the fun stuff. I might not always have anything enlightening to say, but I am a good listener. 💜
Thank you and this means a lot to me. Some of those who know me are saying that you deserve better and your mental condition is important. A good working environment always helps to grow and I don't see any future in this ongoing job...Besides they are taking advantage of my condition...
Thanks dear once again...
Don't suffer burnout throwing yourself into work, overburdened by stress/anxiety, take regular breaks from work with short walks outdoors if possible.
Gigi should be neutered Pets - Netherland not sure which city is closest to you, this article has a few numbers to contact. Both male and female dogs take a day or two to recover, neutering is not a long process, go in during the morning out by afternoon.
Hope this helps, take care, listen to music, read books try keep your mind off of what is happening being away from family, familiar places.
!LUV
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Thank you so much for the information, I will take the time to find a vet who can help me cheaply do this process. I don't want to delay the process because right now, she can't socialize with any other dogs.
I reduced working hours, I was having trouble mentally and physically. Also, I was having a lot of anxiety. I started giving Gigi more attention instead of focusing on the work. I guess I was too involved at work and that's why all these are happening...
Thanks a lot for everything dear, surely this info will help me a lot...
Spending time arranging Gigi as a priority, once neutered will open doors into dog parks where you meet people with a common love of animals. Move anxiety from negative to a positive if possible, we cannot change what has happened, acceptance then try move forward.
I wish you everything of the best with Gigi at your side to keep good company and love.
I have never seen colors like these in my entire life..this sky is speechless magnificent
You know how to talk to me directly lol ..it is always better to express indeed , also even if your posts are depressing it is always nice to read when i have time .
Check out the rights on the internet , depends how many hours a week you work, anything else is just work , they can ask you to do your job also depends on the contract you signed .
You did nothing to deserve this situation. An evil man unleashed a war, and it's his fault, not yours. You are a valuable person, and although we are far away, we consider you very much.
Writing can help you drain your emotions, so you shouldn't limit yourself, or at least that's my opinion.
Take care and I hope you can find someone to help you with your work issue.
Nice pictures and post, I hope you will find a solution.
For me I think here is the good place to talk about everything. The good and also what we are getting trough our lives.
I wish you a nice end of week with hugs 🙂