In my last post I mentioned that my ex had become very ill. And that has only become clearer. Her life expectancy without chemo was a few weeks. It's that serious. Now she is in one of the best hospitals in the Netherlands. But damn, this disease is so hard, she had to have all her teeth pulled because of infections. Then they wouldn't be able to start chemo otherwise. She was in so much pain. I visited there on Wednesday. Fortunately, she is also in contact with her father again, who is coming to visit tomorrow. I may be able to provide some support again at the end of next week. By visiting her. I now also have her cat at home. And that also took some getting used to for my cats. But it seems like they realize that it is sireus now. And that this is the situation now. I spoil all 3 of them. Semmy, Anja's cat, that's my ex's name. is also really a sweetheart. from 3 years old my cats are 14 or so.

I gave the cat a room with its own litter box and food and water. that is his safe room, my cats are not allowed in that room, my bedroom is my cats' safe room and they can go anywhere else. And on some probing meows everything goes quite well. they give each other space. Luckily I also have time to calm everything down here. But in my head I'm not really calm.
I can smoke weed all I want but it hardly numbs me.

The cat is now sitting at the top of the stairs, watching everything. My newest roommate and possibly for good. He is very welcome. And as long as I give all three cats attention, they don't lack anything.

I have a new vaporizer. Got it from my brother. And I think it's cool. It fills a glass that you can drink empty. And it only takes a little bit of weed, so that's nice if you don't have much. The high is good too

Here you can see what it looks like from the inside and where you put the weed
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I want to end this with a beautiful shadow hunter that I noticed this week.

Yes my life is a mess. But fortunately I am still healthy (as far as I know) and I am reasonable in the here and now. I count my blessings. I hope my ex will make it, luckily her heart and lungs are fine so that is a small plus point. But she's about to go bald and those chemo's are no fun either. All I can do is support her. And give hope. Life is unforgivably hard sometimes. just like my dad. That was actually hopeless and the chemo was too heavy for him. But we'll see. My ex is super tough.
semmy is in good hands

I'm going to finish my post. and get some rest because I'm tired. And hope that miracles will happen in the coming days. For now I wish everyone the very best. And thank you for taking the time to read my post. Greetings Loona
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