"By Yourself", Way More than Just Being Alone...

20 minutes. That is the amount of time I have dedicated, daily, to what happens to me. In those minutes I am only me. I am not my job, I am not the zeros in my bank account, not only anyone’s mother or anyone’s girlfriend; daughter, aunt, sister of absolutely no one. I have chosen this habit of focusing only on myself for that finite amount of time, because it is what I can afford... They say we are many versions of the same person at different moments... Well, I cannot be or choose to be what I know I am because that would put at risk several things that others depend on, but I can be my most authentic self in those precious 20 minutes.

For myself. I have decided to make several truces. It is a truly uncomfortable and very rarely debated truth, but there is hardly space for everyone in the things we long for in life. So, sooner or later we have to develop the ability to be bold. With the boss we cannot stand, or even with a family member who, just for sharing the same blood as us, believes they have the right to trample you perpetually. That is where the idea of possessing several versions of yourself comes from...

At some point in our early childhood or adolescence, we are taught that if for some reason we end up alone, we have automatically reached the end of our lives... We are programmed to fear the very concept of solitude recklessly. Overlooking that it is not even a debate. Sooner or later we will end up in some kind of solitude. It is not about whether it will happen or not, but when, and whether we will truly be prepared for it... Within minimalist philosophy, the value of oneself is intrinsic.

You cannot share something if you do not start from the fact that we begin with ourselves, not apart from the other. That said, demystifying a little the collective terror toward the idea of solitude is a very valuable and appreciated idea; at least for me. I do not wish to live in a world where dependence and the interest that dependence teaches bind all relationships... During the course of each one of those 20 minutes, I truly think, live, breathe and act being absolutely myself... And that is something that, although it seems strange to understand, really is the complete opposite.

Or could you be yourself in every context, situation or moment? Mmm, I do not know, allow me to doubt it a little... It is not personal toward you, it is common sense. We would drive away everything and everyone if we truly showed our total authenticity. Perhaps we have invented a bit the fear of solitude to replace what we hide.... No matter how things happen, I come to confess before you and to use that minimalist window as context to release my little secret... And thus, modestly, help you combat that fear of being left alone. Perhaps it is time to see the glass half full, instead of half empty, do you not think?